I wrote all this, and then I applied for a photography job. HAH, but they are providing the camera, and I did learn about ISO. So what are you going to do? Keep saying yes.

I told my family that I was not doing nonprofessional-professional photo sessions anymore. I hate frauds and feel like one whenever I go out with a family.  My equipment is old and Sam was about to take our long lens and canon off to college at SUNY Maritime (it was his afterall),

As I used to say in the 80s, I like things to be “caszh”, as in casual, spur-of-the-moment, and off-the-cuff. I’ve liked my old equipment. It makes the photos look painterly.

I’m a home arts gal. This is the Quale curse. My nana, dad, uncle, and aunt all toiled away at the creative arts at home, stubbornly learning through trial and error with our own salty aesthetic.

I am trying to cross the threshold into the professional world with my writing. It needs to be my focus. Still, when I even try to imagine it, I feel like Dracula emerging from his crypt into the morning light. I’m set to burn.

Over dinner one night, I told my family a version of this because a mom saw Sam’s prom pictures and wanted me to take Luke’s prom pictures. I told my family that I was going to say NO.

They were devastated. “Oh, mommy, you have to take Luke’s pictures. Luke is so nice to me,” Cal said.

Dave said, “I get what you’re saying, but I think you make the exception for Luke. Do you know how supportive Kevin has been of Cal at soccer?”

Then, out of nowhere, Sam pipes in. Because we only know the family from Cal’s sports, I assumed Sam could care less, but suddenly he’s pro-photo shoot, “You have to do it, Mom. Luke is going into the Navy. He’s GOING OUT TO SEA.” (like Sam is)

“Please, do it. Please.” Cal again with the pleading eyes.

I was ambushed.

So, I said yes, and all the same discomfort reigned. It’s two in the morning, and I’ve spent hours trying to compensate for my old camera. This couple has very different skin tones. Also, someone from the Botanical Gardens wanted some copies during the shoot. There was a retinue of people who thought I was getting paid. I was so nervous.

FRAUD ALERT. It’s weird to go around with a camera and proclaim your ignorance. I do like to stand behind my salty aesthetic.

From now on, if anyone would like me to take their picture, they should do what the toddlers do, which is hang around me when I have a camera, play flag football with Cal, sail with Sam, or rent me a cabin in the woods, or hang out in my garden.